新题型：英语四级真题及详解精讲版(2006年6月)

　　三、范文点评

　　对题材的成功挖掘是写出好文章的前提。文章第二段具体选择了三种比较全面并具有代表性的原因。这样一来，段落层次分明又符合逻辑，是很成功的构思。文章最后一段正反两方面的论述也颇有深度。语言表述简练，没有语言错误。形容词、动词的选择多样化，富有变化。

　　【生动的用词】undertake实行;ideal理想的;diverse多样的;prefer喜欢;agreeable平易近人的;desirable渴望得到的;undoubtedly毫无疑问;inevitably毋庸置疑

　　【丰富的短语】cater to满足;lead to导致;be popular with受欢迎;have effects on对……有影响

　　【多变的句式】

　　本文行文过程中尝试着变换不同的句式，让文章读起来不那么枯燥。多种时态交叉使用，使作者思想清晰明了。如：“Firstly, an ideal lecturer should have an interesting and humorous teaching style, so that students can learn their subjects in a relaxed and pleasant atmosphere. Secondly, a diverse academic background is also preferred since a knowledgeable teacher can greatly enlarge students’ scope of knowledge.”逻辑性强，语言功底深，为文章增添了亮点。

　　借助逻辑关联词，如since，as，however等，以及顺序关联词，如firstly，secondly，last but not least等，可使论述连贯，思路清晰易懂。文中最后一句是非限定性定语从句 “which may lead to the opposite direction of high education quality”，它的使用突出了作者鲜明的态度，且言简意赅，紧扣提纲。

　　四、避错指导

　　考生在本次四级考试写作过程中主要会出现一个问题：主题不明确。主题不明确的原因未必在于审题不当，而是由于不会写主题句。主题句如果过于宽泛概括，会影响考生集中精力阐述主题，甚至使考生下笔千言却离题万里。如本次写作过程中有些考生将主题句写成“possible ways to make the teaching more attractive”或“how to help students study better”等都会使论述偏离主题。避免此问题的办法是参照提纲写主题句，围绕主题句展开讨论。

　　行文过程中很多考生为了“展示文采”或是出于习惯，喜欢写一些长句或松散句，但很有可能所写的句子成分不全，或逻辑混乱。如：

　　1. Students can learn more professional knowledge what can give them best help in their future work.

　　【纠错】该句的主干成分为Students can learn more professional knowledge，其后的成分从语法结构上看应为knowledge的定语，what引导名词性从句不能充当定语，此处的引导词应为which或that。另外，learn一般不与konwledge搭配，说“学习知识”一般用get/acquire knowledge。

　　【改正】Students can get more professional knowledge which/that can give them best help in their future work.

　　2. Any university, that is blind to students’ interest in study, may fail to improve its education quality.

　　【纠错】该句两个逗号之间的成分应为非限定性定语从句(即定语从句与所修饰的先行词之间用逗号隔开了)，其先行词为any university。虽然that可以引导定语从句修饰其前面的名词，但当该名词与定语从句之间用逗号隔开时，引导词应使用which，而非that。

　　【改正】Any university, which is blind to students’ interest in study, may fail to improve its education quality.

　　3. Some people believe that students pay a lot of attention to their lecturers even if they value their college education.

　　【纠错】even if意为“即使，纵然”，该词的使用令该句的逻辑出现混乱，因为even if作连词引导让步状语从句，如I will leave this company, even if I have to pay a high price. (纵然我会付出很大代价，我也要离开这家公司。)从逻辑上看，they value their college education应为前句的原因或条件。

　　【改正】Some people believe that students pay a lot of attention to their lecturers since they value their college education.

　　另外，考生在使用固定短语时的错误也比较普遍。如“在校园里”应为on campus，很多考生误写成in campus;“令人满意地”应为to one’s satisfaction，考生误用to one’s satisfied;“相比之下”应使用by contrast，考生误用by the contrast等等，不胜枚举。

　　总之，好的作文应在保证句子正确的前提下，尝试着变换不同的句式，从而让文章读起来不那么枯燥。但行文过程中要特别留意句子的结构和词语的固定用法，避免因表述不清或错误造成失分。