四级冲刺临阵指导:名师帮你改作文范文欣赏

　　四级作文题目

　　Directions: For this part you are allowed 30 minutes to write a letter based on the outline below. You should write at least 120 words. You live in a room in college which you share with another student. You find it very difficult to work there because your roommate always has friends visiting. Write a letter to the Accommodation Officer at the college.

　　1.要求下学期换一个新房间。

　　2.解释原因。

　　3.要求单间。

　　点评名师：

　　李艳华：新东方优秀的写作老师之一。博士生在读。言语平实，内容详尽，逻辑清晰，简洁实用，经验丰富，教学成绩显著。

　　Dear accommodation officer:

　　I’m Lily, a sophomore in our university majoring in French. I’m writing to you because I want to ask your help (删)for changing for a new single room in next semester.

　　As for the reasons why I’d like to change my room, there’re the following points. Now I share the room with another girl. I find that living with someone else is not as pleasant as it seemed to me before, for I can’t keep (enjoy)my privacy and do things freely as I’ve (had) hoped for. Moreover, she always has friends visiting, which makes it hard for me to concentrate on my work and even to have a good rest. Last but not the least, as I want to receive (pursue) the (post)graduate education after graduation, I should prepare for the examination with a great deal of concentration from now on.

　　So I’d like to live in a single room next year. I appreciate it very much if you would help me.

　　December 23,2008

　　To Accommodation Officer:

　　I am sorry to trouble you. But i serious have no idea. (for it seems I have no other choices but to write to you for help)

　　I wants to change a room next term, because my roomate always has friends visiting.when

　　I looked the book that they was deeply affected me so I can't serious studise.(Almost every time I read ,I am greatly bothered by them, making me hardly concentrate on my study )If somebody noise nearly me When i am looking the book that i would very angry.(what is the worse is that when I am bothered I am easy to be lost in great depression and even anger.)

　　I would be take part in the examination for the graduate student.( Also, I will attend the entrance exam for the postgraduate , which requires a quiet surroundings for me to study well and rest well.)therefor i want (to ) live only myself (so) that i can put all myself into the studies. I am very need a room to study. Can you help me?

　　Expecting you answer!

　　yours

　　recebcca

　　句子错误较多，内容表达不清，尚需努力。

　　Best

　　November 28, 2008

　　Room 205, Building 3

　　Dear Sir/Madam

　　My name is xiao ming. I am a student majored in economy.

　　There is a problem about the room which I and another student live in. As we seen(as we can see), the environment where we live is very good, (with)big room, comfortable bed, telephone and so on. But the student--my roommate, he (删)always has friends visiting. That makes me very difficult (it difficult for me)to work and have a rest. At the same time, my money and computer will be unsafe.

　　So i hope that you can supply a new room for me next term. I hope the room is a single room, so i can work well and have a good rest. Of course, i can pay the money double.

　　I'm looking forward (to )your answer.

　　With many thanks

　　xiao ming

　　注意基本的搭配用法。

　　Wishes